All I can say is.....

Fuck

Is it just me or does Mickey B have a problem with the English language?

There's a war going on people!!

Saw an interesting little article today, Michael Bay (he off the very loud and not particularly good films) will not be making Transformers 2!! I'm still weeping now.

Now that fact that he won't be making Transformers 2 has nothing to do with him suddenly realising he made a right mess of Transformers 1, but more to do with Paramount and DreamWorks deciding to pop there arse completely over the fence, majestically landing on the side of HD-DVD. This has upset Mickey as his Magnum Opus (which sounds a bit like the Autobot they keep in the loft and don't like to talk about) will not be hitting Blu-Ray this Chrimmy. I hate to disappoint him but his little movie hit the Usenet servers roughly 3.5 minutes after its first screening.

This got me thinking. I have a dusty PS3 and a radiator I like to call a 360; Blu-Ray in one, HD-DVD in the other. This decision shouldn't worry me, as I have both systems and have no intention to buy Transformers on either format no matter how detailed it may be, but for some reason it does.

I'm beginning to feel that I have bought into the war, I have bought new format discs, I have supported both sides. I can no longer claim to be a conscientious objector, but that’s what I feel I should be.

For a while I have been converting my legally purchased DVD's into AVI files, storing them on a rather large hard drive and streaming them to the telly via XBMC on my old brick. Alternatively I have been downloading the films that I already own to save me the bother, in 15 minutes. You heard me correctly a good quality AVI in 15 minutes, perfectly watchable and in some cases my old eyes couldn't tell you the difference between the AVI and the DVD (even when up scaled). A library of films, all available at press of a button, a button even the Doris and kids can use!! Those shelves, the ones over there, see them, the ones that were groaning under the weight of all the DVD’s we own. Nope no more, they are all in the loft now, those are empty shelves, nice aren’t they. We live in a digital age, a world spinning to the sound of 0 and 1’s, so why are we arguing about a disc format? Why am I bothering buying any disc format? Where are my downloadable movies? In HD? With DTS sound (I have no need for 7 speakers)?

Sony, Microsoft UK (yes we know the sceptics already have this) I'm looking at you. Whichever one of you can get me my downloads, at a reasonable price, will win my business. Whichever one of you manages to get over yourselves and utilises your multi-media systems for multi-media rather than some crippled, DRM-infected file type, gets my sheckles. Do you want my sheckles?

Stop trying to get me to don my cammo gear and camp out for you in this war you seem to want to perpetuate, I'm sticking a flower in my hair and shouting peace man. We ain't gonna wait for you guys forever; there are ways and means, free love.

NS oot

Will SKU just stop?!

Many moons ago when Microsoft released details it's new Xbox 360, Sony were quick to criticise the company. Two different versions of the one console was, they pointed out, confusing to consumers. To be honest I didn't think that it was complicated. I thought that the Core was lame, but not confusing. Premium was where I wanted to be, and I assumed that the Core would disappear after a while. Fast forward to the PS3 launch, and again it seemed two versions of the console would be released. Again, the choice seemed pretty straight forward for me though in the end only the 60Gb version made it to Europe.

I understand the desire to have a cheaper console along side the top spec one. But things are getting out of hand. Microsoft now have an Xbox 360 Core, Xbox 360 Premium and Xbox 360 Elite. Sony have the 20Gb, 60Gb and 80Gb versions of the PS3, along with slightly different insides depending on whether or not it has hardware or soft/hardware PS2 emulation.

The thing is, the temptation to upgrade just isn't there for me. The 360 looks stunning running on VGA, and I have no desire to start paying MS for films or TV. So they can keep their incredibly expensive new 120Gb hard drive (£130?!). I can pick up a huge SATA hard drive for the PS3 pretty cheap, so even PS3 owners with the 20Gb machine have no need to upgrade. I understand all of this - it's not complicated. But for an industry that says it wants to be mainstream, it has a lot to learn.

How many non-gamers are looking at the current market and wondering what the hell is going on? It's not enough that we have three systems with three different disk formats. Now we have different versions of them too. It's a ridiculous state of affairs. Perhaps it's no surprise that the only new console on the market to have one simple SKU is the one that is running away with the first prize. If the Wii was any more mainstream it would be made by Ford. Yes it's no-frills, run of the harware. But it's easy for people to understand, even if they haven't been playing games for 25 years. It's time Sony and Microsoft started to learn some lessons from Nintendo.

My love for EA

"Yes, at last!" I exclaimed as I watched my stats hit 100%, "finally I have acheived it, I have achieved my goal. I am now ready to take on the world, online play here I come" I shouted to bemused looks from the kitten chewing on my left foot. Tiger Wood 2007; you are mine.

Ok, maybe a little explanation is needed. I've never been a TW fan, I was always a Links lover on the ol' brick and 360, but due to my compatriates in OAP extolling the virtues of TW07 I decided to give it a shot. Down to Game I went clutching my grubby notes in my hand, these I exchanged for a new, shiney game. Home I rushed to present my gift to the black dust god in my lounge, and it began to load......

To begin with I was shite, absolutley shite. My first online game I managed a round of 100 odd..not good, time to stat up my golfer. So I approached the offline game...and I was hooked. I've now been playing this game for a solid 2 months, no other disk has been near PS3. It's a great way to relax after work, a couple of rounds of golf, sat on my arse for an hour after a hard days work sat on my arse for 8 hours. Last night I reached my goal, and thats where we came in.

Chatting to Bendz today, I mentioned my acheivment and whether he was up for a round or two this weekend, now that I may stand a chance. "TW07?" he asked, "TWo8 is out at the end of the month isn't it?". My blood ran cold, surely this could not be true, EA wouldn't do this to me would they? So off to the game website I trot, and yes, there it is, TW08 release date 31/8/2007.

WHY EA WHY? Why do this to me and the many other faithfull out there? It's still 2007, 2008 isn't for a fair few months.

On a serious note here and the point of the above tale, I'm sure this is the 21st century. We have PSN, a great idea...why am i expected to pay another £40 for an iteration of a game that now includes "Shot Confidence"? Now the game knows when I'm crap at a hole and (even if I may stand a chance) fuck my shot up for me because I have the other 20 times I've played it! This is a glorified upgrade isn't it? I would be more than happy to pay £20 for a download from PSN that "upgrades" my current version to the new.

Even worse, I can't find any mention of being able to transfer my golfer. I HAVE JUST SPENT 2 MONTHS IMPROVING MY GOLFER YOU BASTARDS!! So now I have to start again, all that work gone, my evenings...............gone.

EA I love you, but at the same time I hate you. I'll buy the new version, you know I will, thats why you do it to me. I'll even trade in the new version and get £1.99 for it as I'm sure you'll be turning the servers off in a couple of weeks. But hear me, and hear me good, if I see Tiger Woods walking down my High Street anytime soon, he will be getting a twatting........

.......and relax

(nieve) NS out.

PS. Special mention goes out to Kai...just because OK

Fanboys, Forums and Children

I am old enough to remember some famous match ups in the video game industry. I was one of the playground foot soldiers fighting the corner for my beloved Speccy against the heathen C64 clan. I was there when the Atari ST and the Amiga fought to the death. I watched as Mario and Sonic beat the hell out of each other. When the Dreamcast was finally finished off by the PS1 before the PS2 had even got into it's stride, I was there to bid it farewell. Sony's dominance of course extended against the Xbox, but it was much closer than anyone expected. No-one dies. And now we are back to the traditional one on one bloodfest. PS3 v Xbox 360.

Now before any Nintendo fans jump down my throat I should say that I have not forgotten the Wii. On the contrary, the Wii is a huge (and inexplicable!) success. But it was Nintendo themselves who went to great lengths to tell us that the Wii was not next gen, but "new gen". They have cleverly placed the Wii in its own little place. So let's leave it there.

So it's Microsoft v Sony. Two companies that instantly generate opinions in the gaming world. MS is of course viewed as an evil corporation and peddler of sub standard products. Sony meanwhile is viewed by many older gamers as the scourge of gamer, putting quantity firmly before quality. And attracting lots and lots of kids. But what both sides have their own global PR departments. They don't hire any staff. They don't even publicly recognise that they are there. But both companies use them none the less. Fanboys.

First off let me immediately acknowledge Fangirls. This is not something which is unique to males. But the term Fanboy has come to be more of a generic term, so that's what I'll use here. So. Fanboy. Let's turn to our lexicon of all things, Wikipedia for a definition.

"Fanboy is a term used to describe an individual (usually male, though the feminine version fangirl may be used for females) who is utterly devoted to a single fannish subject, or to a single point of view within that subject, often to the point where it is considered an obsession. Fanboys remain loyal to their particular obsession, disregarding any factors that differ from their point of view."

Sound familiar? Thought so, particularly the part about "disregarding any factors that differ from their point of view". That's important because without that you become a little more rational.

So we have one set of people screaming on about the PS3 being the best thing ever, while at the same time mocking any and every aspect of the Xbox 360. Two way traffic here though, as the 360 owners ate pointing at the PS3 and doing exactly the same thing. So what? As I said this has been happening for years. Nothing new. Well there are a couple of subtle differences this time round. Firstly people have far more access to the internet now than in the past. So it's easier for someone to post their views up on a forum. Moreover, there is less responsibility required because of the faceless nature of forums. You can rant on in the most illogical and ill-informed manner you like. There’s no real comeback.

The second difference is the one that mystifies me. Fanboys are not boys anymore. They are men and women. The pursuit of childish division is now carried out with gusto by otherwise rational adults. Why? Are these just fanboys who have grown up only to find that part of their brain hasn't developed? It's very odd. And very. very boring. I frequent a number of forums that purport to be aimed at mature gamers. Mature? Are you kidding?! Go onto an Xbox 360 or PS3 forum and mention the other machine and you will often be met with a barrage of childish, inaccurate and downright pathetic comments. Others will constantly snipe, hiding behind the façade of “just having a laugh”. And these are “adults” remember. Even more bizarre is the situation faced but people like myself who own both systems. Some people simply cannot handle that you could enjoy the different games offered by both systems. Why do they do this?

I guess there are a few factors. All fans are like this. Ask a football supporter what he or she thinks of their fierce local rival and you will rarely get an answer of “yeah they are a good team, play attractive football”. So maybe I am expecting too much. The companies involved certainly don’t want it to stop. They drip feed information and misinformation to their loyal fans and then leave them to evangelise their systems and games all over the place. I think that one of the biggest factors might be money.

If you buy a games console you are investing a lot of money. If you have bought a PS3 then right now the stark reality is that you have spent hundreds of pounds on a system that has so far failed to deliver a game that goes anywhere near justifying that investment. The 360 meanwhile will be 2 years old this year, and so will plateau in the next 6 months. Do you really want to admit that the system that you have been pouring money into for the last 2 years is getting on a bit?

So maybe todays fanboys and girls aren’t trying to convince anyone else that their system is the best one. Maybe they are trying to convince themselves. But keep it down will you? While you are banging on about hardware architecture, servers and subscription fees some of us are trying to play games.